Long time, no write! Part II
9:47 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
So, tomorrow is the last day precepting on 2 East (ortho, M/S overflow). I have been precepting with Alma Ochs for 6 weeks now (tomorrow is my 12th day). I have had good days and bad days.... so I will try to highlight my experience (I will try, try, try to do better at writing during my time on 3 Main.
I had a hard time initially, because I was used to a preceptor like Sue and Alma was very different, not worse, but just different. I tend to shine when the pressure's on, and I was receiving a lot of help, which made me feel like I wasn't truly responsible for everything. It was also hard to keep track of what was being done and what wasn't since we were sharing all of the responsibilities. I can't imagine how hard it was for Alma.
The 2nd day, I spoke with Alma about allowing me to fully take 2 patients and do all of the work. That day went really well. I had my good days and bad days, and two days ago I took 5 patients for the first time. This was a wonderful learning experience. I really needed this chance to see how well I handled a full load. There were LOTS of medications due at 9, and we happened to have all but one ortho patients with cardiac problems. I haven't had a lot of experience with determining when to hold medications as it pertains to cardiac, so I found myself holding TONS of stuff, either because the BP was low, the HR was low, I hadn't check K+, etc. Then I had a patient that needed to have all of her medications crushed and mixed with pudding. Thank goodness Alma did this for me.
I DID do a good job of keeping track of my IV I/O's, PCA's, completing my charting early, so at the end of the shift, I felt very prepared to hand off everything.
On a non-technical note, I had the opportunity to care for a gentleman who was sent to our floor with terminal colon cancer..... 31 years old. Besides the fact that he was my age with a wife and 3 children, he was always so kind when I didn't know exactly how to use the colostomy bag i was supposed to change or when I was fiddling around with the morphine drip. He told me one evening that he didn't know if people realized how much we did, but he really appreciated it. It was an extremely touching moment. Of course, I tell blake about the days that I have and i mentioned this man.... blake asked me if his name was... "X". It was. how did he know him? turns out blake played football with him, and his kids cheered and played football for the jr rams.
I noticed that he was readmitted the day that I worked (Wednesday). He didn't look good. I went into his room to say hello, and he was completely unaware. He couldn't even hold his eyes open.
We did our 2nd debriefing today, and I found out that the previously mentioned gentleman passed yesterday. I had an overwhelming flood of emotions. I felt my body go cold and I started sweating all at the same time. My heart started beating so hard that I could notice my vision blur every time my heart beat. I haven't cried during my time in class, although we have talked about some sad things. Now i know why. I am very much all or nothing with crying. I barely got out the door before I lost it completely. I came back in and told everybody about what he had said that one time and how I thought "how in the world can someone muster up enough thoughtfulness and strength to say such a thing in that stage of life/death."
eye opening.
more to come....
